are good and some days are bad. I do notice a difference since I started taking "my happy pills". I just think the stress of rasing two children on your own is taking it's toll.

Brian spends more nights in Granbury than he does at home. The hours he is working and the amount of money we have been spending on gas... it just makes more sense for him to stay out there; however, I miss him like crazy. I'm sick of sleeping in my huge king size bed alone, not to mention the lack of sex. I'm 30 for crying out loud, I'm in my sexual peak... and I'm not getting any. Your toys can only do so much for you... there is a time when a woman craves human contact, skin on skin. Right now I would settle for someone to just cuddle with.

It has become obvious to me that what I want isn't good enough if Brian doesn't want the same thing.
I know what I want, but my want isn't enough for the both of us.
There is nothing more I can say and I'm at a loss for what else I could do to convince Brian that our marriage is worth fixing.
I'm cutting the cord... the ball is in Brian's court now. It's up to him.

He's free to walk if that's what he wants to do.

I will always love Brian... after 11 years I just don't see how I couldn't. He has been an important part of my life and I would love for that to continue, but not at the expense of our happiness. God bless him in whatever his decision may be.